Its been a while!

I know its been a while since I have updated everyone on my fatness. So here is the scoop. As of today August 30th I am down 26-28 pounds. That keeps fluctuating. My pants have gone down a size, from a 18 to a 16. My shirts are starting to look like baggy shirts that once clung to ever roll on my body. Sadly my bra size has gone down a size or 2.

I look down and see parts of my body I forgot were there. I was laying in bed the other night and felt my pelvic bone sticking out. I said HOLY COW I have one of those! I kept touching it because I was so proud of it. Allan said "Stop touching it!" I am usually the one that says that to him AHAHAHAH! Its amazing how much better I feel not only physically but mentally about my self. I still have about 40-45 pounds to go but my first goal was to get below 200 and I am there!!! This morning I weighed in at 187. Which is less than I weighed when I did the HCG. When I did that I felt shitty. I was tired, grumpy and felt so run down. This time I feel better. When I went to the Dr last week she said I had lost 5.5 pounds last month. That was good news but the bad news was it was all lean muscle. So this week my goal is to drink more water, start back on the treadmill at least 4 times this week and EAT more protein. I know that I have been stressed out over this KayDee teenage bull shit and have just completely forgotten to eat all of my calories. Now that the kids are back in school and I have a little more time to focus on things I need to do, I am hoping that will help. I am proud to say that I have achieved 3 of my goals since April and that feels pretty good. First goal- get below 200. Second Goal- get out of the 190's. Third goal- 20 pounds by the end of August! CHECK ON ALL! My next goal is to be in the 170's. I find that taking it 10 pounds at a time it helps me focus on the long term goal better. I have also in the last week or 2 been able to cut my medication in half. I was starting to feel on edge and having lots of anxiety. My Dr told me that it was most likely that my medication was too high now and told me to try and slowly take it down half way. So its been a week of being at 40 mg from 80 mg. I feel better. Not so on edge. I hope at some point in my life I will be able to be medication free. But that might be something that is not possible for me. When I started taking it my sweet crazy Dr told me that it might be something I will need for the rest of my life even if it is in small doses. There is a history of depression and anxiety on both sides of my family (even though most don't want to admit it). To me its nothing to be ashamed about. Its an illness and some people suffer from chemical imbalance and some don't. Just like some people have to wear glasses and some people don't. I used to be ashamed of having to be on medication to balance me. Until I went off it one time and saw and felt what it was like without it. YUP I WILL TAKE THE CRAZY PILLS! I joke and say crazy pills and some people think that I am being rude or their feelings get hurt. NO I don't think that I am crazy or anyone else that has to take the pills. So I am sorry if anyone took it the wrong way. Its just me being me. :)

I am sure most of you heard that the girls talked me into a puppy. We had talked about it for a while and I kept going back and forth. My friend had said that puppies are lots of work and take a lot of time. Which was something that even though I am not working find I have little of. I had logged onto the Co-Animal shelter to just take a look at what they had. There was this face that I had to go see. I thought about him all day long and finally said OK girls lets go see this little guy. He is 2 years old (so not a puppy) He is a Yorkie Terrier is what the pound says. He seems a little bigger than a Yorkie. Amanda thinks he is a silky Terrier which really doesn't matter to me. He is just so cute. He has got some abandonment issues though. He doesn't like to be left alone EVER! Which is OK now that he doesn't smell like the pound. Some of you might even be shocked to hear that I let him on my BED! Something I said I would never do. But its hard to say NO to that little face. He is my little shadow when the girls aren't home. This will be the first day that I will need to shower and its like having a baby I don't know how I am going to do it. Allan took Sha to school today and Aubrey and I were still in bed and he started barking and ran in the office jumped into the window and started barking at them. KNOCKED EVERYTHING off the window bench AGAIN! Then he went and showed them and pooped in the basement. It seems like when we leave him alone he poops. Otherwise he has been so good about going out side. He will get our attention and head to the back door.

Allan spent the weekend making sure he couldn't get out anywhere in the yard. Since he seems to be an escape artists. I hate to lock him up when we aren't home and just let him be. But he is naughty and its funny he knows when he has been naughty. His tail goes between his legs, ears and face down. Its hard not to say OHHHHH its OK little guy. Allan has to be the mean one and tell him he is naughty. I do when I have to. But other than the day he escaped from his kennel and tore apart my house he has been pretty good. I am starting to think that we should of named him Shadow though! I can't even pee without him sitting in front of the bathroom door waiting for me to come out. But I am glad we got him. He likes to sleep with Shaleigh and Aubrey gets her little feel bads hurt. I try to tell her not to take it personal he just has a spot on Sha's bed that he likes. He will some time decided he wants to sleep with you too. I think he get smothered by Aubrey. She wants to touch him and be in his face and sometimes he just wants to be alone. Here are a couple of pictures. He has since got a little hair cut because he was un-even and Auntie Amanda fixed him up. Even with little bows :) I know he is a bot. But It was so cute. They lasted like 10 minutes he pulled them out.